mom enough to dismiss TIME

May 13, 2012- Mom Enough?  What?  Are you kidding me?  That was my reaction when I read the headline to the controversial TIME magazine cover.  Even someone like me who is too busy being a mom (the sheltering type who shields her offspring from continuous footage of wars, murders and the like) to turn on the national news has heard about and seen the cover.  You know, the one with the blonde haired mom in skinny jeans breastfeeding her nearly 4-year old son who happens to be standing on a chair to reach her mammary organs.  


I was so disgusted by the title I didn't even read the article.  Yes, I get it, TIME is known for shocking and controversial photos on the cover of their magazines.  I can't help but think they are dealing with this one as "any publicity is good publicity".  As the mother of two young boys that push the limits on a regular basis, I've learned to let some things just roll off my back- figuratively and literally.  But not this.  This is not publicity.  This is my life.  And not only are you so far out of touch with it, you have just crossed the line into it.

Since when does breast-feeding define one's worth as a mother?  I breast fed my kids night and day until it hurt.  I had blisters to prove it.  It was not the blissful experience that successful breast feeders may lead you to believe.  It was not easy and I did it as long as I could manage to remain a stable person.  I got help and I tried my hardest.  It was the absolute hardest thing I've ever attempted, but I wasn't able to make it more than a few months.  During that time I became someone I didn't even know or recognize.  My babies needed more from me, and I'm not just talking about milk.  So does that make me less of a mother than someone who was able to do it longer?  Your answer had better be no.


I've received advice about mothering and parenting from the moment I became pregnant.  From other moms, grandparents, friends, doctors, neighbors- basically everyone.  There is an entire army of marketing professionals that target people like me.  They spend billions of dollars to figure out what they think I need to hear and then bombard me with it.  


But let's get something straight.  I have a purpose.  A job.  A mission to raise my boys to be kind, caring, polite, considerate, mannerly and a whole host of other things.  And when you dare to question my methods I will attack you like a beast.  My boys will be men someday.  Someone's husband and someone's son-in-law.  And I want the best of my boys to shine through above all else.  They will not be flawless but they will darn sure have gone through the fire to be good men.  


I may not make the perfect decisions on mothering, parenting, disciplining, feeding, or any number of other things related to child rearing.  But I can assure you, without hesitation, every single decision is what makes sense for my family and our situation at the given time.  It is not selfish and it has nothing to do with what any doctor or journalist or nosy bystander cares to recommend to me.  I think I'm smart enough to hear and read endless amounts of advice and still discern what will work and make sense for us.  I don't proclaim my ways to be the best or the only way.  But I surround myself with mom-friends who have similar values.  They are my support system and my reassurance that even when the little things don't seem to go right, there is a bigger picture.  I don't question their parenting, nor do I engage in this sort of "mom-enough" mentality that would insinuate a judgement or war between mothering styles.  


So remember this, TIME magazine:  You've been around a long time.  But mother's have been around even longer.  I don't need your magazine with its reputation and award winning journalists to get my news or debate an issue for me.  I don't care if you try to win me back with your special issues covering Royal weddings.  I will not give in.  I have choices.  I have the internet for goodness sake.  My generation of mothers and those that follow behind me are surely smart enough to pass over the out-dated format of your magazine.   I am influencing the next generation every waking minute of the day.  And the ones in this home will learn that TIME is poison.  


Now, if you'll excuse me, it is Mother's Day and my kids and husband will spend this day loving me and appreciating all I do for them, reassuring me that I am absolutely MOM ENOUGH!